Harry Potter Spoiler

Harry Potter 7: the Deathly Hallows comes out this weekend. I've become privy to some insider information I've decided to share. I'm sure that some will be disappointed by this action, but given the adult themes in the newest Harry Potter, I think you'd be well advised to read on.

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• Ron dies - by Harry's hand!
• Hermione gets knocked up
• Harry dumps Ginny for Neville
• Snape and Lucius are seen on the Marauder's Map together quite often after hours
• Harry's owl Hedwig, sick of being 2nd fiddle, eats the retarded elf Dobby
  
• The Dementors start up a polka band

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